Relative (It's All)

LifeWife and I went to a shindig for one of my aunts, Aunt Ruth was celebrating her 85th birthday. Earlier this year we went to a shindig for another one of my Aunts, Aunt Phyllis, who was celebrating her 80th birthday. Sadly also within the past few months we went to the funeral for one of my cousins. At each "event" I was whelmed, not overwhelmed, just whelmed, by these people, my relatives. (Assuming that the construct whelm is a less radical feeling that overwhelmed. I'll check that out later.) Scott hosted the birthday celebration for his Mom, my Aunt Ruth and Scott is one of my cousins that I really didn't know. We knew each other and exchanged greetings and such at family events, but I really didn't know him. It wasn't until recently at Aunt Phyllis's that Scott and I really communicated, and it was a shared illness in one of each of our childrens lives that was the precursor to our getting to know each other better. My appetite has been whetted.

There were lots of stories I didn't know, children of cousins I had no idea who they were, relationships I was simply not a part of. And yet, they all knew me, most of them knew LifeWife, I didn't feel like an outsider, I did feel connected and a part of them, but I am wondering how much richer could that/those relationship(s) have been. I guess you need to get a little older to begin to see these things and recognize the value that is there. OR you need to grow up with the interaction happening all along. Cousins who I really didn't know, cousins I have, that I have perceived far differently from who they really are.

I grew up in Nigeria, West Africa, and really lost some connectivity with these people, these relatives, because of that. And it hasn't been until relatively recently that I have realized the gap this has left in me.
----COGITO INTERRUPTUS
Interestingly, when D1 was born we were living in Calgary. After she was born it wasn't too long before I really began to feel that we should move back to Toronto. I wanted my daughter to grow up knowing her cousins and knowing her aunts and uncles, I wanted her to have what I didn't have. I wanted her to have a lifetime of memories from infancy of being surrounded and having available the people in her life who were connected/related to her Mom and Dad.
----COGITO RESUMPTUM

LifeWife is far better at keeping track of my cousins than I am. Its like she has the program and when I'm not sure whats going on she brings me up to speed.

Will this change? Will I try to get to know them better?

I hope so...